Sunday, February 22, 2015

Moving From Pity to Praise

I began this post in November, when we received word that Billie would deploy. However two weeks before the scheduled departure, that changed. Well now it's appropriate all over again. Billie is scheduled to deploy in a handful of days, and I find myself navigating similar feelings. However it gives me courage that I feel stronger this time around because of the lessons I started learning then. Hope this may encourage someone. Thanks for reading...

We got word that Billie is re-deploying.

And the tears man, they just keep comin'. 

 At unexpected times and for unexpected reasons.

When my alarm goes off. On my drive work. Into my bowl of butternut squash soup at the dinner table.

Realizations of the ways our lives will look differently for the following months than I had planned. 

But a few things I've learned about grief...

Emotions come and they go. Acknowledge and accept them even when you don't understand them. 

Anxiety, anger, loneliness. It's ok to feel those. 

All at once or all in a matter of 5 minutes. 

It's ok. 

Just don't live there.

Instead, focus on the here and now.

Focus your thoughts on what is TRUE, not feared or confabulated.

Give "one day at a time" a new meaning by refusing to let your mind wander into tomorrow, next week, or next month, attempting to anticipate how you will feel or how you will cope with each life event. 

The "what ifs" are the Enemy playing tricks on you. 

God can handle it. 

And if you are a Christian, his Spirit lives IN you, meaning you have access to incredible power. 

So when thoughts creep in that breed fear, start to praise instead. 

When a voice says, "This lonely feeling is what you have to look forward to..." 

Take that thought captive and say instead, "Lord, I trust you."

"You won't sleep soundly through the night again."

Say, "That's not TRUE. Lord, I trust you." 

"What will you do if you get sick and you're here alone?"

"Lord, I trust you."

God knows what you need. He created you after all. 

And He can meet those needs however He chooses. 

Through a random text that makes you giggle. 

Through a small vision of a peaceful and joyful future. 

Through chamomile tea, which I think has magic sleeping properties. 
(And benedryl for the nights chamomile doesn't work.) 

Through supernatural strength that will be waiting for you when you need it. 

I'll ask God each day to direct my thoughts. And I'll take captive the thoughts that don't align with what I know to be true. About me and about the Lord. 

And then I'll wait. Wait for the peace promised to those who keep their MINDS on Him. 

"You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you! Trust in the LORD always, for the LORD GOD is the eternal Rock." (Isaiah 26:3-4 NLT)


  1. So true!
    Love this. And love you.
    Thanksgiving is the antidote for worry and self pity.
    Praying for you and Billie!

  2. Someone forwarded this to me because he knew I had lived through a similar circumstance. My husband was deployed for the first Gulf War. You will grow in ways you cannot even imaging during this time, as you are already experiencing. Thanks for sharing your firm conviction that God is faithful. I will be praying for Billie's safety and for your peace during this time. If you ever need to talk or find a 'virtual' shoulder as a landing spot for the tears that will come, I'm here.

  3. Love this post KJ. Seriously great words of authenticity and courage. We will be praying for both of you.